A Person’s Greatest Enemy
Human beings. Quite complicated.
Is the reason for my reaction my emotions, my values, my inner voice, my regrets, my dreams, me? Who was I? What am I now? The list keeps growing, and the questions in my head never end.
On the other hand, understanding some things may be easier than we think. I find relief each time I discover methods that are at least worth trying, and I can’t wait to share them.
Last year I attended a Positive Intelligence training led by Shirzad Chamine, founder of the PQ Coaching Program. He has developed an accessible, easy-to-understand tool for the “inner critic” we talk about so much in coaching. What is this critic, you ask? Cicero’s “A person’s greatest enemy is themselves” seems to me to have been said about this critic inside us, the judge, the enemy, call it what you will. Unlike what we usually do, this time I won’t fall into the trap of judging the situation. Instead, here is the good news: by human nature, everyone has an inner critic mode. Perhaps in different types and forms, dominant or kept in check. But most of the time, a self separate from us gets in our way before anyone else does. In our progress, our learning, our growth. If I’ve managed to explain the critic in my own way, I now want to tell you about the tool I learned in the training: Positive Intelligence – Saboteur*
The tool is lovely and practical… It gives you the chance to quickly see on paper sides of yourself you hadn’t thought about before. It consists of 53 questions and is open to everyone free of charge. For now the language is English only, but for those facing a language barrier I can suggest translation sites or a helpful friend. After you complete the test, your result arrives at your email address right away, and you learn something about the sides of you that dominate and sabotage you.
The results are automatic, so not all of the assessment content may apply to you. These are exactly the moments when you would need a coach. A few of a coach’s powerful questions might be: Among all this information, which topic do you choose to focus on? What else does your critic say to you beyond these? What do you notice? And with this awareness and what you’ve learned, what will you do differently next time?
If the coach you work with is also someone you trust, someone with whom you openly share everything, you are one step closer to silencing your inner critic. Your wish to do something for yourself and reach out to people who can support you is admirable in its own right, and I already congratulate you on your courage to see the obstacles within, your openness to learning and your focus on growth.
*https://assessment.positiveintelligence.com/saboteur/overview
Would you like to talk about this topic as part of your own development journey?
AUTHOR
Azer Karabıyık
Career Transition Coach PCC, ACPC, ORSC
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