Bluebeard
Every journey a woman takes toward her essence surprises me, and it also sheds light on our more authentic, creative and natural selves. This time my inspiration is Dicle Erkenci, whom I met at the Adler Coaching School: an incredibly literary, creative and productive woman. She recently started a book club, and the book we will be reading is “Women Who Run with the Wolves.” At first it was the harsh, wild title that caught my attention, then came great excitement, though I also felt a little distance. Then I started wondering what secrets might lie in the wild world within me, one that is mine alone. I raised my hand for the reading club invitation right away.
We live in a strange country. Here, women talking among themselves is either considered “marginal” or made fun of. It had sunk into my subconscious, and for a long time I too kept away from these subjects, wondering what on earth these women get up to among themselves. I could almost hear the remarks, seemingly good-natured at first but quite prejudiced, like “Is it one of your women’s get-togethers? Gossip again, right?” Things changed as I matured, as I had a daughter, and as I began to draw on the leadership of motherhood to act more courageously and listen to my intuition. I’m glad they did. Clarissa Pinkola Estes’s “Women Who Run with the Wolves” is a unique work that every woman should read, one in which we can find the power of our nature. And since we live in a society that tenses up at the very mention of a book, I used my facilitation skills to look for videos introducing the chapters, hoping to inspire more people. The ones I liked best and felt closest to were Melisa Volkan’s. If you’re curious, you can watch the summary and commentary on the Bluebeard story here.
The character the book describes in its “Bluebeard” chapter is an archetype that every woman meets in her life at least once. I likened this chapter to the story of the film “Bergen” and thought about the film from a very different angle. I think it explains with pinpoint accuracy why Bergen couldn’t listen to her intuition and was fooled by her monster every time. In the society we live in, the fairy tale, or belief, that women should be well-behaved, gentle, modest and mannerly, finish school and build a happy home, alienates us women from our intuition. Worse still, it never protects us from dangers, whether outside or within. On the contrary, women are left forever in need of protection, and weak. Wouldn’t the ability to “sniff out danger,” which already exists in a woman’s essence and is typical of wild wolves, make us stronger, more cautious and more aware?
If what I’ve written has left even a small taste on your palate, I’d like to let you know that you are invited to our Thursday gatherings, held every two weeks. Come, let’s talk, let’s go deeper, let’s grow, and grow stronger, together. I can’t wait to introduce you to Dicle, the leader of the book club.
Would you like to talk about this topic as part of your own development journey?
AUTHOR
Azer Karabıyık
Career Transition Coach PCC, ACPC, ORSC
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